McCain Wins Missouri by 0.12%

John McCain has finally been declared the winner in the state of Missouri - making it officially slower than Alaska in counting the votes. McCain's narrow victory over Obama also breaks a bellwether streak in which Missourians had picked the winning presidential candidate in every election since 1956; unless you count the real results in 2000 and 2004

With all jurisdictions reporting complete but unofficial results, McCain led Obama by 3,632 votes Wednesday out of more than 2.9 million cast - a margin of 0.12 percentage points. Both men spent considerable resources trying to win Missouri, a state that Obama ultimately did not need for his national victory. Missouri's 11 electoral votes make the final electoral vote tally 365 for Obama and 173 for McCain.

DHL to Leave USA - Thank John McCain

As this campaign ad points out, John McCain was instrumental in bringing about the takeover of Airborne Express by foreign company DHL back in 2003. Now the results of that action are impacting families across the country. As of January 2009, all of these Ohio jobs along with thousands more across America will be gone.

Obama on Cheney's McCain Endorsement

Barack Obama praised McCain for his hard work to get the Dick Cheney endorsement. Obama:

"I'd like to congratulate Senator McCain on this endorsement because he really earned it. That endorsement didn't come easy. Senator McCain had to vote 90 percent of the time with George Bush and Dick Cheney to get it. He served as Washington's biggest cheerleader for going to war in Iraq, and supports economic policies that are no different from the last eight years. So Senator McCain worked hard to get Dick Cheney's support".

"My Friends" - The Musical

Mr. Straight Talk himself stars in this musical inspired by his most favorite of phrases:

McCain in Defiance

. . .Um, as in the town. Not the emotional mode. Although I can see the ease in making that assumption.



John McCain appeared before a crowd of 6,000 adoring fans commandeered students in the nearby community of Defiance, Ohio today. As it turns out, not only was "Joe the Plumber" a no-show for the campaign event, but more than 4,000 students were bused in from schools in the area. The entire 2,500-student Defiance School District was in attendance in addition to at least three other schools from neighboring districts, one of which sent 14 buses. I guess I just automatically assumed that J Sid would be opposed to "busing". Go figure.

I gotta say, as a parent, I'd be after the head of the supe of my school district if my kids had been "schooled into" a political event w/o my prior knowledge AND approval.

Was John McCain a Traitor in Vietnam?

A number of Vietnam vets claim that this is the case. Some of them say he gave information on troop movements to the communists. Others claim that he was aware of live American soldiers left behind at the end of the conflict. Much of the information is classified and inaccessible. Some of their voices:

Chris Farley reincarnate?

You tell me. . .

McCain Drops the "C" Word, Again!

"Rates were cunt, err cut, in the Bush years":

McCain Left On Campaign Bus Overnight

Campaign officials downplayed the incident, saying the senator was fine as soon as he was fed and taken to the bathroom.

The Ballad of Johnny McCain 2008

John McCain is Cotton Hill!

I keep comparing John McCain to Abe Simpson. but I've long felt that there was another fictional character that he more closely represented. Here it is!

Hide the Moose and Ground the Choppers!

Okay. . .I guess we likely don't actually have any moose here in the Hoosier state, but, given Sarah Palin's cognitive skills, ground the choppers regardless. From the air, she might mistake a herd of dairy cows for her favorite game and locals dogs may morph into wolves an the aerial view. That's right folks, Caribou Barbie is invading our state!

John McCain has only made one appearance here so far, in July, and hadn't even set up field offices here. He's either taken the state for granted, or he's a complete idiot. On second thought, both options apply in this case. This is a state that George Bush won handily in the last two elections, a state not won by a Democrat since 1964, but. . .Obama is a popular senator from a state that borders Indiana. He's well known and often in the news in the heavily populated northwest part of the state. He's set up dozens of field offices in Indiana and narrowly lost to the popular Hillary Clinton. In short, he should have been responded to months ago!

And now, rather than making a personal appearance, McCain sends in his designated "feed red meat to the base" surrogate? Well, golly gee, shucks, say it aint so Joe John! The narrow base of racist, ignorant, low-information voters is all you have left. I guess I'm not surprised that you would hide behind Sarah Palin; after all, she's far more popular with those folks than you are. They're accepting you as a requisite to elect HER. I almost feel sorry for you. ALMOST. The "Maverick" exists no more. . .he is but an empty vessel, sold out to the Rovian machine that selected Palin to appeal to the core hatred of the neo-con culture.

You can't possibly win this election at this juncture. You've traded your reputation, your political career, your entire being, on one last roll of the dice. Sorry, John - snake eyes for you.

McCain Flips on Mortgage Buyout

John McCain whipped out his surprise idea at the start of Tuesday night's debate: The American Homeownership Resurgence Plan, which would direct the government to buy up bad home mortgages, allowing strapped people to keep their property. His campaign posted details of the plan online immediately after it was announced that night. The final paragraph of that plan included this language:

“Lenders in these cases must recognize the loss that they’ve already suffered.”

In other words, the government would buy the mortgages at a discounted rate, reflecting the declining value of the mortgage paper. That sentence, however, was completely omitted from the same document when presented the following morning. Staffers claimed it was always meant to be that way, and that the sentence was an "oversight". There's another, more accurate, word for it: "bait". The wording was included originally to make the statement more palatable for those who would likely oppose it as McCain really intended for it to work, forcing us to pay face value for the troubled documents, which was the main reason that Barack Obama gave for opposing the plan.

Obama Campaign Economic Policy Director Jason Furman said in the campaign statement opposing McCain's plan: "John McCain wants the government to massively overpay for mortgages in a plan that would guarantee taxpayers lose money and put them at risk of losing even more if home values don’t recover. The biggest beneficiaries of this plan will be the same financial institutions that got us into this mess, some of whom even committed fraud."

As usual, the Pander Bear is looking out for his lobbyist cronies and wealthy friends in the financial sector, promising Americans what they want to hear, and pulling the rug out from underneath them under cover of darkness. Is anyone actually fooled by this man's games anymore?

Foo Fighters to McCain - You're not Our Hero

Oops! Turns out that John McCain STILL hasn't learned his lesson about music plagiarism. In my fourth installment on this topic we learn that the Foo Fighters, through news reports, discovered that the McCain campaign has been using "My Hero" without their permission and fired off a missive insisting that they cease usage of the song immediately.

Dave Grohl said, "The saddest thing about this is that `My Hero' was written as a celebration of the common man and his extraordinary potential. To have it appropriated without our knowledge and used in a manner that perverts the original sentiment of the lyric just tarnishes the song."

My Hero

Our Cellmate - John McCain

Grampy got confused again today. Listen:

John McCain's Rage

"I have a temper, to state the obvious, which I have tried to control with varying degrees of success because it does not always serve my interest or the public's." - John McCain

Keating Economics

The current economic crisis demands that we understand John McCain's attitudes about economic oversight and corporate influence in federal regulation. Nothing illustrates the danger of his approach more clearly than his central role in the savings and loan scandal of the late '80s and early '90s.

Oops - Grampy Pissed Off Roger Ebert!

Guess who's NOT coming to dinner?
Great job, John McCain. Even Roger Ebert is pissed off at you. Then again, I'd be a little touchy too after reviewing the presidential movies of the last quarter century. . ."Bonzo Goes to Washington" (1980), "First term - The G.H.W. Bush Story" (1984), "Watching Danny Grow" (1988), "The Dukes of Little Rock" (1992), "Read My Lips - The Monica Files" (1996), "Chad and the Supremes - Stealing the Oval Office" (2000), and "Fooled Me, Won't Get Fooled Again - HA! Ya Did Get Fooled Again, Suckaz!". "No Country for Old Men gets a double thumbs down from this humble blogger as well. Roger's thoughts:

"I do not like you, John McCain. My feeling has nothing to do with issues. It has to do with common courtesy. During the debate, you refused to look Barack Obama in the eye. Indeed, you refused to look at him at all. Even when the two of you shook hands at the start, you used your eyes only to locate his hand, and then gazed past him as you shook it.

Obama is my guy. If you are rude to him, you are rude to me. If you came to dinner at my house and refused to look at or speak with one of my guests, that would be bad manners and I would be offended. Same thing if I went to your house. During the debate, you were America's guest.

What was your problem? Do you hold this man in such contempt that you cannot bear to gaze upon him? Will you not even speak to him directly?
Do you think he doesn't have the right to be running for President?
Were you angry because after you said you wouldn't attend the debate, he said a President should be able to concern himself with two things at the same time? He was right. The proof is, you were there. Were you angry with him because he called your bluff?

During the debate, Jim Lehrer repeatedly called upon both candidates to speak directly to each other. Obama looked at you. He addressed you as "John," which as a fellow senator is his privilege. His body language was open. You stared straight ahead, or at Lehrer, or into space. Your jaw was clinched. You had a tight little smile, or a grimace, or a little shake of your head.

I had to do two things at once while watching the debate. I had to listen to what was being said. And I had to process your rigid and contemptuous behavior. If you were at a wedding and the father of the groom refused to look at or speak to the bride, how would that make you feel? Especially if you were the father of the bride?

You made a TV commercial showing the moments Obama agreed with you.
Everybody knows he did. Did his agreement show honesty, or weakness?
It is significant that you said it proved he was not ready to lead.
What is the better leadership quality: (1) Willingness to listen to your opponent, and keep an open mind? (2) Rigidly ignoring him? Which of the two of you better demonstrated the bipartisan spirit you say you represent? Was there anything he said that you agreed with? Could you have brought yourself to say so?

I'm not the only one who noticed your odd, hostile behavior. Just about everybody did. I'm sure many of your supporters must have sensed the tension. Before the debate, pundits were wondering if you might explode in a display of your famous temper. I think we saw that happen, all right, but it was an implosion. I have instructed my wife to exclude you from any future dinner parties."

McCain's a "celebrity" Too!

After mocking Barack Obama and labeling him as a celebrity, it turns out that Grampy McSame has spent over $5,000 on his own personal Hollywood Make-up artiste! Tifanie White, the makeup artist who works on "American Idol," performed cosmetic services for the "senior" senator on several occasions, most notably before his joint appearance with Barack Obama at Saddleback. I guess John Edward's $400 haircuts weren't all that extravagant after all. . .

Letterman Mocks McCain

"We've got a guy like that NOW"

"In the middle of the taping of his show today, Dave Letterman got word that McCain was, in fact just down the street being interviewed by Katie Couric. Dave even cut over to the live video of the interview, and said, "Hey Senator, can I give you a ride home?"


Earlier in the show, Dave kept saying, "You don't suspend your campaign. This doesn't smell right. This isn't the way a tested hero behaves." And he joked: "I think someone's putting something in his metamucil."


"He can't run the campaign because the economy is cratering? Fine, put in your second string quarterback, Sara Palin. Where is she?"


"What are you going to do if you're elected and things get tough? Suspend being president? We've got a guy like that now!"

UPDATE: Video