Flatulence in the First Degree

A 13 year old Florida student has been arrested for assault with a bodily substance:

A student at Spectrum Junior-Senior High School was arrested earlier this month after he passed gas and turned off his classmate’s computers, according to a report released Friday by the Martin County Sheriff’s Office.

According to the report, the incident occurred Nov. 4, when the 13-year-old boy “continually disrupted his classroom environment” by purposely breaking wind. He then shut off some computers other students were using.

A school resource officer placed the boy under arrest after he confessed about his behavior, according to the report. He was charged with disruption of school function and released to his mother.

Middle School Teacher Sent to Principal for Principles

Dennis Yuzenas, an American history teacher at Bak Middle School of the Arts in West Palm Beach, wore a Barack Obama T-shirt to school after the election. Principal Elizabeth Kennedy, who saw the teacher wearing his Obama shirt on the school's TV news show, took issue with that action, claiming that it was against school board policy, and requesting that Yuzenas sign the following memo which would be placed in his permanent file:

"Last Friday, November 7, you wore a T-shirt that clearly showed which candidate you supported during the recent Presidential Election and appeared with students on the in-school news broadcast sharing your positive view regarding the outcome of the election," the memo read.

"As per the Code of Ethics and the above state School Board policy, students may not know your political view," it continued. "This could be construed as using your position to influence others. It is my expectation, that in the future as you teach students to clarify and express their own political views, you will remain neutral."

Yuzenas asserts that, despite his very liberal views, he remained very apolitical during the campaign. He even went so far as to park his car away from the school to prevent students from seeing his numerous bumper stickers. As for the T-shirt, Yuzenas said it was also part of his lesson plan that day:

"I was talking about the role of art in society," he said, "and tying in this T-shirt to Picasso's Guernica."

The shirt, which showed a red-and-blue image of Obama with the word "Hope" under it, is the work of Shepard Fairey, an obscure Los Angeles street artist. The image, which Fairey made into 300 posters, caught the attention of the Obama campaign, which liked it so much that the image was mass produced, becoming an iconic image of Obama.

"It's making education relevant to kids," Yuzenas said. "How much more relevant can you get in an arts school than talking about the role of an artist in an election?"

Yuzenas has refused to sign the principal's memo because he's not actually in violation of the ethics policy. Indeed, School Board Policy 2.59 allows teachers to express their own "political, social and religious values" if the "total presentations is essentially balanced and fair."

Teachers are expressly prohibited from allowing their interaction with students to further their own "political aims or views."Yuzenas pointed out if he's a propagandist, he must be a lousy one, because his students showed the strongest support for John McCain during a school-wide mock election."I don't want students to think like I do," he said. "I want them to think."

Al Gore Returns to. . . Florida

Al Gore returned to the scene of the crime that occurred eight years ago to campaign for Barack Obama:

"So, where were we?" That was the bit of humor former Vice President Al Gore delivered Friday in Florida, the state that dashed his White House dreams eight years ago after a confusing ballot, dimpled punch cards, hanging chads and a Supreme Court decision that stopped a 36-day recount. In the end, George W. Bush won the presidency by just 537 votes. "It's been a long eight years," Gore said as he took the stage to raucous applause from about 200 supporters.

Bill Clinton FINALLY Onboard!

Bill Clinton revved up a crowd on behalf of Barack Obama in Florida Wednesday, his first since the Democratic convention. And though he repeated his mantra that Democrats don't have to "say one bad word" about their Republican opponents to win the election, Clinton actually snuck in a dig against Sarah Palin. Watch:

Hillary Clinton - "No Palin!"

Hillary Clinton campaigned in Southern Florida today and had a few strong statements about the McCain/Palin ticket -

"To slightly amend my comments in Denver," she said, "no way, no how, no McCain, no Palin."

The nation should be proud that the Republicans have a woman on the ticket, but argued that returning Republicans to the White House "is like asking the iceberg to save the Titanic."

"I am here with a very simple message," she said. "We must work as hard as we possibly can to elect Barack Obama the next president of the United States."

Watch:

"Huge Swing" for Dems in Florida

Anthony Man of the Broward County Florida's Sun-Sentinel reports on the tremendous inroads Democrats are making in southern Florida, as well as the long-term implications of their success:

In the 1980s, charismatic and popular President Reagan helped bring a generation of voters into the Republican Party, where they stayed for years, affecting the balance of power in Congress and in state governments.

Robert Wexler (U.S. Rep.D- Delray Beach,& co-chair of Obama's Florida campaign) sees Obama repeating the same thing today with first-time voters such as Jonathan Caprio — who registered to vote Friday at Southwest Regional Library in Pembroke Pines — joining the Democratic Party.

"I'm excited to vote for whoever is running for the Democrats," he said. "I don't have much of a choice. I don't really like the other party."

Michael Martinez, an associate professor of political science at the University of Florida, said there aren't many people shifting from the Republicans to the Democrats. But the allegiance of first-time voters is significant.

"New voters tend to identify with the hot party at the time. In the 1980s, a lot of new voters were identifying with Reagan, because he was sort of the hot commodity," Martinez said.

A reverse Reagan Revolution? I think alot of Republicans already smell the change in the air this year. . .or maybe that's another smell entirely.

In God We Trust - Florida style

No IGWiT's in the Sunshine State - just I Believe'rs:

For perhaps the first time in recent history, Florida has gotten something right. Miami Democrat Representative Ed Bullard, a supporter of the new plate, one of four with religious themes, concedes that ''some people'' may find something wrong with it, but he said it was a license plate for those people who may want something other than a plate that has a manatee or picture of the Challenger space shuttle.

No, Eddie, despite all of the guffaws over the 2000 presidential election, butterfly ballots, and unapproved early primary dates, you and your fellow supporters of these plates have actually gotten this one right. As with any other "specialty plate", your state is charging an extra fee for these tags. As it should. The $25 fee will go to an Orlando based non-profit group that will use it for faith-based education for Floridian youth. Nicely done.

You see, here in our fine state, our legislature decided to produce similar plates and distribute them at no extra charge to residents. In fact, these plates were actively pushed by our DMV - workers were instructed to "sell" them at every opportunity. Did I mention that these new plates cost more to produce than the standard issue plates and that the extra cost was passed on to Indiana taxpayers whether they approved of, or desired to obtain, the plates for their own vehicle? I guess I just did.

Anyways, Florida, I just wanted to give you an "attaboy!" for getting this right. By the way, if you are open to trading players from our respective state legislators. . .call me. (wink)

Hillary, your word must be your bond

Clinton was against counting FL and MI before she was for it:

DNC Chairman Howard Dean
Letter to Democratic Presidential Candidates
August 31, 2007

"As the leader of the Democratic Party, I strongly urge you to adhere to the 2008 Delegate Selection Rules...
The 2008 Delegate Selection Rules adopted by the full DNC at its August 2006 meeting clearly provide that only 4 states - Iowa, Nevada, New Hampshire and South Carolina - may hold their respective contests prior to February 5, 2008. The findings of Non-Compliance included a 100% loss of pledged and unpledged delegates."

Hillary Clinton Campaign
Statement On The Four State Pledge
September 1, 2007

"We believe Iowa, New Hampshire, Nevada and South Carolina play a unique and special role in the nominating process. And we believe the DNC's rules and its calendar provide the necessary structure to respect and honor that role. Thus we will be signing the pledge to adhere to the DNC approved nominating calendar."

Eagle Ray kills Woman

An unidentified Michigan woman died in a freak accident today off of the Florida Keys. The woman, 55, was sunbathing on a small boat when a large eagle ray jumped onto the craft and landed on her. Conflicting reports state either that the 80-100 pound ray crushed her or caused her to strike her head, or that the ray stung her in the neck.

Eagle Rays are common in the waters off South Florida and the Keys. They normally live close to the coast in depths of 3 to 60 feet and in exceptional cases they are found as deep as 900 feet.

These rays can grow extremely large; up to 17 feet in length with a wingspan of up to 10 feet. They also have a long tail which is armed with sharp barb, it looks like a whip and may be as long as the body.

Florida "revote" tabled by state party

State Party punts to DNC Committee

The Florida Democrats have reached their decision. They will not be holding a revote for their primary, banking instead on the decision of the Rules & Bylaws Committee:

Last week, the Florida Democratic Party laid out the only existing way that we can comply with DNC Rules - a statewide revote run by the Party - and asked for input. Thousands of people responded. We spent the weekend reviewing your messages, and while your reasons vary widely, the consensus is clear: Florida doesn't want to vote again. So we won't. A party-run primary or caucus has been ruled out, and it's simply not possible for the state to hold another election, even if the Party were to pay for it. Republican Speaker of the Florida House Marco Rubio refuses to even consider that option. Florida is finally moving to paper ballots, which is a good thing, but it means that at least 15 counties do not have the capacity to handle a major election before the June 10th DNC primary deadline. This doesn't mean that Democrats are giving up on Florida voters. It means that a solution will have to come from the DNC Rules & Bylaws Committee, which is scheduled to meet again in April.

Read the full memo HERE.