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Tuesday, November 21, 2006

A message from Michael Moore

A Liberal's Pledge to Disheartened Conservatives ...by Michael Moore

To My Conservative Brothers and Sisters,

I know you are dismayed and disheartened at the results of last week's election. You're worried that the country is heading toward a very bad place you don't want it to go. Your 12-year Republican Revolution has ended with so much yet to do, so many promises left unfulfilled. You are in a funk, and I understand.

Well, cheer up, my friends! Do not despair. I have good news for you. I, and the millions of others who are now in charge with our Democratic Congress, have a pledge we would like to make to you, a list of promises that we offer you because we value you as our fellow Americans. You deserve to know what we plan to do with our newfound power -- and, to be specific, what we will do to you and for you.

Thus, here is our Liberal's Pledge to Disheartened Conservatives:

Dear Conservatives and Republicans,

I, and my fellow signatories, hereby make these promises to you:

1. We will always respect you for your conservative beliefs. We will never, ever, call you "unpatriotic" simply because you disagree with us. In fact, we encourage you to dissent and disagree with us.

2. We will let you marry whomever you want, even when some of us consider your behavior to be "different" or "immoral." Who you marry is none of our business. Love and be in love -- it's a wonderful gift.

3. We will not spend your grandchildren's money on our personal whims or to enrich our friends. It's your checkbook, too, and we will balance it for you.

4. When we soon bring our sons and daughters home from Iraq, we will bring your sons and daughters home, too. They deserve to live. We promise never to send your kids off to war based on either a mistake or a lie.

5. When we make America the last Western democracy to have universal health coverage, and all Americans are able to get help when they fall ill, we promise that you, too, will be able to see a doctor, regardless of your ability to pay. And when stem cell research delivers treatments and cures for diseases that affect you and your loved ones, we'll make sure those advances are available to you and your family, too.

6. Even though you have opposed environmental regulation, when we clean up our air and water, we, the Democratic majority, will let you, too, breathe the cleaner air and drink the purer water.

7. Should a mass murderer ever kill 3,000 people on our soil, we will devote every single resource to tracking him down and bringing him to justice. Immediately. We will protect you.

8. We will never stick our nose in your bedroom or your womb. What you do there as consenting adults is your business. We will continue to count your age from the moment you were born, not the moment you were conceived.

9. We will not take away your hunting guns. If you need an automatic weapon or a handgun to kill a bird or a deer, then you really aren't much of a hunter and you should, perhaps, pick up another sport. We will make our streets and schools as free as we can from these weapons and we will protect your children just as we would protect ours.

10. When we raise the minimum wage, we will pay you -- and your employees -- that new wage, too. When women are finally paid what men make, we will pay conservative women that wage, too.

11. We will respect your religious beliefs, even when you don't put those beliefs into practice. In fact, we will actively seek to promote your most radical religious beliefs ("Blessed are the poor," "Blessed are the peacemakers," "Love your enemies," "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God," and "Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."). We will let people in other countries know that God doesn't just bless America, he blesses everyone. We will discourage religious intolerance and fanaticism -- starting with the fanaticism here at home, thus setting a good example for the rest of the world.

12. We will not tolerate politicians who are corrupt and who are bought and paid for by the rich. We will go after any elected leader who puts him or herself ahead of the people. And we promise you we will go after the corrupt politicians on our side FIRST. If we fail to do this, we need you to call us on it. Simply because we are in power does not give us the right to turn our heads the other way when our party goes astray. Please perform this important duty as the loyal opposition.

I promise all of the above to you because this is your country, too. You are every bit as American as we are. We are all in this together. We sink or swim as one. Thank you for your years of service to this country and for giving us the opportunity to see if we can make things a bit better for our 300 million fellow Americans -- and for the rest of the world.

Michael Moore
mmflint@aol.com(Click here to sign the pledge)http://www.michaelmoore.com/
P.S. Please feel free to pass this on.

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Blogger Lew Scannon said...

Especially number 12!

title="comment permalink">November 20, 2006 10:39 PM  
Blogger sumo said...

I'm on Lew's page too. That was right on!

title="comment permalink">November 21, 2006 5:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i signed the pledge -- thanks!! this is great!

title="comment permalink">November 21, 2006 10:42 AM  
Blogger Tim Zank said...

Gotta hand it to your "Messiah" that's quite a pledge. I'm with Lew, #12 is a great idea. You might ask his immenseness to start with Alcee Hastings, John Murtha, and William Jefferson. Isn't it considered proper to clean your own house before telling your neighbor to clean his?

title="comment permalink">November 21, 2006 1:07 PM  
Blogger John Good said...

Gee, Tim. It seems to me that we had to clean your house (and senate) for you first. Give us some time here. . . ;)

title="comment permalink">November 21, 2006 8:03 PM  
Blogger Donnie McDaniel said...

So Tim, I take it that you are not happy with the ass paddling that got handed down. SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! Thank you sir, may I have another! ROFLMAO!

As far as William Jefferson goes, that is up to us down here in Louisiana to try to take care of first. We are drumming up support for Karen Carter so Dollar Bill can get the same kinda of paddle to the ass like your guys got! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! If we fail to get Dollar Bill out, then we will have to let the leaders take it on.

title="comment permalink">November 22, 2006 2:24 AM  
Blogger Tim Zank said...

Donnie..those weren't the results I had hoped for obviously, but I'm a big boy. I can handle a little bad news. I do hope you are able to wash yourself of Dollar Bill, he's a real dandy....

title="comment permalink">November 22, 2006 9:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think this pledge is great. The best part of the election isn't that the Dems won it is that people stood up against bullying. I got so tired of hearing people say you are a "traitor" for whatever you didn't agree with them.

title="comment permalink">November 24, 2006 1:17 PM  
Blogger John Good said...

Perrey - Exactly. It's alot more difficult to stand up against tyranny that to walk along with the mob. There IS hope in America again. . .

title="comment permalink">November 24, 2006 4:36 PM  

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