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Friday, December 05, 2008

A Message to you Dang Kids


If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears. With their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking Twenty-five miles to school every morning …. Uphill… BOTH ways. …… Yadda, yadda, yadda

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, There was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they’ve got it!

But now that… I’m over the ripe old age of thirty, I can’t help but look around and notice the youth of today.

You’ve got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!

And I hate to say it but you kids today you don’t know how good you’ve got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn’t have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, We had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!!

There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter, with a pen!

….Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!

There were no MP3’s or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself!

Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ’d usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!

We didn’t have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that’s it!

And we didn’t have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn’t know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

We didn’t have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like ‘Space Invaders’ and ‘asteroids’. Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your Imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever!

And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only m-net And there was no on screen menu and no remote control!

You had to use a Little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning. Do you hear what I’m saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-bastards!

And we didn’t have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove … Imagine that!

If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.

That’s exactly what I’m talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You’re spoiled. You guys wouldn’t have lasted five minutes back in 1980!

The over 30 Crowd

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Blogger Stan Matuska said...

John - did you write this? It's very Good.

I think every generation goes through the same thing. As time goes by, life changes. When our kids have kids, they will be saying things like "we never had hover crafts", we had to actually change our tires, and could only go where the roads would take us"!

When I visit people at the nursing home, they often reminise (sp) about what their Christmas was like. They were thrilled with the homemade sweater, or new shoes! Boy, try giving just that to kids today!!!

There are actually some things that were better in our days than our kids. Such as being able to play all day and night withought having to check in, because it was actually safe to do so! We actually talked more to our friends, family and neighbors face-to-face. Our kids today will never know what a care-free like is really like. But, in summary, yes, our kids are spoiled rotten, but they are just a product of their 21st century environment.

Oh, I remember something funny. A couple of years ago I took a picture of your kids at Halloween when you visited our home. My digital was on the fritz, so I used a disposable camera. After I took the pic, both girls ran over and said "let me see! Let me see!". It suddently dawned on me that I didn't know how to tell the girls that they couldn't "see", and that times have changed!

title="comment permalink">December 06, 2008 12:52 PM  

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