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Thursday, April 12, 2007

WWJD?

Most people assume WWJD is for "What would Jesus do?". But the  
initials really have been changed to stand for "What would Jesus
drive?"

One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old Plymouth
because the Bible says, "God drove Adam and Eve out of the
Garden of Eden in a Fury."

But in Psalm 83, the Almighty clearly owns a Pontiac and a Geo.
The passage urges the Jesus to "pursue your enemies with your
Tempest and terrify them with your Storm."

Perhaps God favors Dodge pickup trucks, because Moses' followers
are warned not to go up a mountain "until the Ram's horn sounds
a long blast."

Some scholars insist that Jesus drove a Honda but didn't like to
talk about it. As proof, they cite a verse in St. John's gospel
where Christ tells the crowd, "For I did not speak of my own
Accord..."

Meanwhile, Moses rode an old British motorcycle, as evidenced
by a Bible passage declaring that "the roar of Moses' Triumph
is heard in the hills."

Joshua drove a Triumph sports car with a hole in its muffler:
"Joshua's Triumph was heard throughout the land." And,
following Jesus' lead, the Apostles car pooled in a Honda...
"The Apostles were in one Accord."

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14 Comments:

Blogger Hill said...

ROTFLMAO!
I used to own on of those *cough* holy Triumps (Spitfire). Convertible, NO top, no garage. Rain? After it was through, just open the doors and let the water pour out. Swear.

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 6:52 AM  
Blogger Peacechick Mary said...

Ha! Of course, Jesus did also drive the money-changers out of the temple, so I don't know what that is.

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 7:55 AM  
Blogger Undeniable Liberal said...

Oh my. Sermon of the day.

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 8:34 AM  
Blogger Frederick said...

But did he drive stick, or auto?

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 10:38 AM  
Blogger azgoddess said...

too funny -- see, i think jesus drove a bio-diesel '70 mercedes.....just sounds right to me...

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 12:29 PM  
Blogger Donnie McDaniel said...

I think he went green though. Jesus was a hippy after all. Silly him, he wanted peace! What a bleeding heart liberal! And get this, he wanted to heal people, can you imagine that, he wanted universal health care and compassion. That nut even wanted people to love one another! Can you imagine? What was he thinking?

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 12:53 PM  
Blogger Coffee Messiah said...

Yikes.....I had a TR6 in '71. ; )

I never realized you were so close! I'm in N Manchester.

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 3:17 PM  
Blogger Mariamariacuchita said...

I'm with donnie. I think he's got a hybrid.

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 4:00 PM  
Blogger Robert Rouse said...

John forgot to mention what a nag Jesus' mother was. I heard that she once rode Joseph's ass all the way to Bethlehem.

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 5:08 PM  
Blogger Anon-Paranoid said...

Don't forget that He said render unto Ceasar that which is Ceasars.

So He handed over His salad to Ceasar.

God Bless.

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 8:22 PM  
Blogger John Good said...

I'm still concerned about the number of folks who think that the first man mentioned in the bible was Adam.

To set the record straight, it was:

Chap 1. =)

title="comment permalink">April 12, 2007 8:24 PM  
Blogger Robert Rouse said...

I believe it was in Psalms where we first learned God's name. "Our Father, who art in Heaven, Howard be thy name."

title="comment permalink">April 13, 2007 5:23 PM  
Blogger Pursey Tuttweiler said...

I just got my huge laugh for the day! Thanks. I like the idea of Jesus in a Plymouth Fury!

title="comment permalink">April 14, 2007 12:26 PM  
Blogger Kvatch said...

Now that's a man who knows his bible!

title="comment permalink">April 14, 2007 7:10 PM  

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